delivering the tangibles.

surviving frustration

2009-11-12T08:19:00.000-08:00

so ive just survived my first working-world-fuck-over. this past week has been one of the most frustrating and disenchanting of my life. i found out that at the beginning of my contract my employer had original put me in category 2 on the payscale, and i trusted them so i let it be. 9 months later i find out that when someone has a university degree they automatically start in category 4, and with my previous experience i should have been put in a category 5. that means that over the past year, my employer has neglected to pay me over 2000 bucks, which is almost 4 million colombian pesos, which could pay my rent for the next 2 years. i felt extremely disheartened and "engañada" (its a strong word for tricked) when i found out, but now im alright. i have learned an extremely valuable lesson through all of this: never EVER let anyone make you feel like youre not worth what you get paid. truth is you are worth more than what theyre paying you but theyre being stingy by trying to trick you into think youre not worth as much as you are.

im glad i learned this lesson now, in a job that i have already decided to leave because they wouldnt let me have a life outside of the institution because im a foreigner. (long story short, i had a meeting with the bosses to try and negotiate my contract so that i could work less hours and study my specialization, at the end of which they told me flat out no and that if i worked there they had to have the option to own me and have complete control of my schedule).

onto the next adventure...lets see what i learn this time :)

reunion

2009-10-29T20:56:00.000-07:00

just booked my first ever plane ticket to the midwest, where i will have a heartfelt reunion with abbey in chitown and then trip it to madtown to have a big cuddle-slash-inappropriate amounts of drinking fest with tank ass duke lonney and arthur.

im excited. real excited.

the third world my ass

2009-10-26T16:08:00.000-07:00

i just went to my first doctors appointment ever in colombia. i was in and out in 15 minutes and i felt like i received really friendly and thorough service. when he said it was over and he hadnt done a blood or urine test, i asked "what about the blood and urine tests?" his answer: "we dont do those tests unless we feel they are necessary (for example if the person is overweight or has a history of diabetes or other diseases) because otherwise its a waste of resources and money." then i go to pay my copay..."7,700 pesos please"...the equivalent to less than 4 bucks.

i just got the same if not better healthcare service in a third world country that cost me less than 4 bucks. so far i gots one nothing colombia versus the land of the free.

note to self:

2009-10-19T20:26:00.000-07:00

facebook stalking always gets me in a strange mood and unnecessarily overwhelmed about moving back to the states, which is something that is not going to happen for a long while.

ok so update: im actually doing great, getting a few job offers for next year, and just being instead of planning. its nice not being constantly upset or stressed out, im not going to lie.

starting over

2009-09-13T19:21:00.000-07:00

today i feel like im sort of starting over. mariana left, and she took julian, my other closest friend with her. see i have this tendency to connect people, and it may turn out to be a deep profound friendship or a whirlwind romance (in this case the latter). now that seems awesome, and in a way it is, but the downside in this case specifically is that they turned out to have such a strong connection to each other that now im left in the dust, alone and family-less. im extremely happy and excited to see what comes from their lives (whether they stay together or decide to go their separate ways), but my ego who wants company and doesnt like being abandoned is screaming at me telling me im stupid and now im left alone, with the responsibility to start over.

but guess what? the ego isnt taking over this time. im an extremely blessed person for having the opportunity to create a family here in medellin, a family consisting of a brazilian, a paisa and a street cat. i will always and forever love these people for who they helped me to become, and for continuously teaching me how to love with my entirety, not just seek ego satisfaction.

mari, juli y gus: los llevo en mi corazon para siempre.

amen.

2009-09-02T07:37:00.000-07:00

"You listen to your parents because they have known this world longer than you. But do you think that just by being here a long time anybody knows anything? Do you think time gives understanding? Understanding is not temporal, it is not more experience. It is not the quantity of experience that makes you wise, it is the quality. A single experience can give you more wisdom if you bring the quality of awareness to it. A man may have made love to many women, thousands of women, thousands of time. Do you think he knows what love is? There is quantity, but has he known love? One single love can give you wisdom if you bring quality to it. That quality is awareness. If you make love to a single woman for a single time, with your total being, fully alert, you have come to know what love is. Wisdom is something that happens when you bring awareness to any experience. The meeting of awareness and experience is wisdom." (osho)

and that folks is what i am continuously striving for here in colombia, here in what is viewed as my "year off" by many on the outside, here in life.

woops

2009-09-01T13:30:00.000-07:00

so yea ive been neglecting the blog for a while. heres a small update on life for a. those who still read my blog and b. for future sydney who would like to remember what was going on in life in sept 09...

1. so im staying in medallo next year. this comes as no surprise seeing as life rules here.
2. im in the process of applying to a one year specialization (like a minimasters) in "Proyects of Interior Architecture" that would start in february of next year. its getting me all tingly inside.
3. my 2 best friends are moving to brazil come the 13th, so ive been going through an emo-rollercoaster (ps they should TOTALLY make a themepark ride based on the "emotional rollercoaster"...maybe ill design it in one of my projects) but im handling myself and being honest with them, myself and my emotions, and though im going to miss them terribly, they will be in my life no matter what because they have no idea how much they both have changed me and allowed me to become the person i am today
4. still liking the job, but am needing to negotiate my contract for next year due to the specialization and all, so ill keep you updated on how that goes
5. contemplating moving to an awesome sector called carlos e restrepo or somewhere near there, but its turning out to be extremely expensive so lets see how that works out

all in all, livin the good (and oh so real) life.

thats what ive been saying...

2009-08-05T09:06:00.000-07:00

After all, napping is an entirely normal part of normal human sleep patterns. And studies have shown that short naps enhance alertness and productivity. (nytimes)

naps = everyone content, alert and productive at work. so the question the author puts out is, "why is it easier to find a coffee machine in the office than a spot for a doze? "

and his answer makes sense. napping is personal...work is professional. i have never fully agreed with that philosophy and heres why;
fact: humans are personal beings
fact: humans spend a HUGE chunk of their lives at work
fact: humans form personal relationships at work and form professional relationships just shooting the shit with los de mas
fact: your job pays not only your salary based on professional results but also your personal maintenance such as health insurance and pension
conclusion: no matter how much you try and completely separate the 2, they will never be fully separate because each individual is one being and everything in their life is fluid and seeps into one another.

now im not saying completely mix the two, but what i am saying is lets try and respect the personal side of our personnel by replacing some coffee machines with dormers. everyone will be happy in the end.

awkwardness of being a gringa

2009-07-22T08:27:00.000-07:00

so i had the most awkward encounter a week ago with a taxi driver. honestly if youre white and have blonde hair and light eyes you will get stared at in the rearview mirror by the taxistas and get a couple of weird comments and if you speak spanish well youll get the whole "pero hablas muy bien el español", but very rarely do you get a legit legal marriage proposal for money...

let me explain...

so i get in the taxi and instead of doing the rearview mirror lookdown the taxista turns his body all the way around and begins to study my face, and i mean STUDY it, not in the creepy "i want to do you" way but in a scientific, analytical way. then he finally turns around, proceeds to drive and asks me where im from. common question with common answer.

"im from the united states." next statement is usually a follow up question as to where im from or why i speak spanish well or how long ive been in colombia, but this was not a normal follow up:

taxista: "i have a proposal for you."
me: "im sorry what?"
t: "i have a proposal for you. will you be willing to marry me?"
m: "ummm im sorry what?"
t: "its not for love dont worry. its for business"
m: "im sorry what?"
t: "no im willing to pay you and everything! its not for love or sex i promise!"
m: "im sorry sir i have a boyfriend and i want to get married to him."
t: "oh you have a boyfriend? can you give me his number and ill call him and work out a deal with him."

now this is the point where i go completely silent and pray to god hes not going to take me up to the mountains and do away with me. he notices my silence and then goes on to apologize and say that his parents are in the states and that he was denied the visa so he was thinking about marrying a gringa to get the visa so that he could go with his parents. i felt a bit better, but i still kept one finger on the send button of my cellphone and my keys between my fingers in the other hand. i got home safely, he gave me a discount and apologized again profusely, and i left and took my first breath in 2 minutes.

lets just say im going to have someone accompany me in the taxi from now on even if i have to pay them an extra 10 bucks.

on tv

2009-07-17T18:38:00.000-07:00

my dad's famous...well not really but at least people who watch silly shows in the bronx will be able to recognize him :)

2009-06-15T00:35:00.000-07:00

"You gotta stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone oughtta be"

(richard the texas yogi)

words sometimes can slap you harder than mr. t and his knuckle rings. i just had one of those moments.

the hilarities of being an efl teacher.

2009-06-03T08:13:00.000-07:00

so this post was inspired by a fellow teacher's experience. so the first thing i tell all my students is to drop spanish at the door when they come into the class and treat english as its own separate entity. i believe this is the only real way to understand and learn a language, because otherwise during your entire english practice you will be translating from your native language to the other one, which can pose many problems, some of which i will now begin to explain.

i was going over going out to eat in the US and we began to talk about the internation cuisine available in the states. we got onto mexican cuisine (one of my personal favorites and a favorite of paisas as well), and they began listing foods: quesadilla, tacos, little donkeys...
"Wait...what? Andrés, what are little donkeys?"
"Teacher, you know, little donkeys. They eat them much with Mexican food."
"Andrés are you sure? Have you had little donkey before?"
"Yes teacher. It is my favorite food Mexican."
"Ok, I have never seen little donkey in a Mexican restaurant before."
"Really teacher? Little donkey...como burrito?"
::Busting laughter from said teacher::

in my course 12 we were talking about indirect requests, such as would you mind..., could you..., and so on. we were talking about asking for favors using indirect requests and the following conversation actually happened:
"Ok Diana. Santi has a car and you want him to drive you to class in the morning. How would you ask him?"
"Santi, would you mind riding me all the way to class?"
"Um...Diana. You can't say that in the English."
"Why, teacher? I want him to ride me."
::Busting laughter from said teacher who has the mind of a 13 year old boy::

i was talking to a coworker named rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrafa (you need to say the r like that otherwise it just isnt right) about hilarious instances in class where translations have gone horribly horribly wrong. the following is my favorite:
"Ok, you all have 25 minutes to complete the quiz. Raise your hand if you need help."
::Student raises hand::
"Yes Mauricio."
"Teacher, what verb do you need to use here?"
"I can't tell you that Mauricio. Just do the best you can."
"Ay come on teacher...blow me!" (at which point in the story said teacher from before who is listening to this story busts out laughing to the point where she starts crying)
"What, right here?" (said teacher from before starts laughing even harder)
::Puzzled look on student's face::
"Sopleme in Spanish does not mean the same in English, Mauricio. I'll explain later..."
(for the record, sopleme is like saying "give me a hint", though the literal translation is "blow me")

there are oh so many more, but i like doing things in 3s, so lets keep it at that.

the key to happiness

2009-05-29T08:24:00.000-07:00

some say the key to happiness is love. others sex. others chocolate. others model cars. ive always said the key to happiness is your surroundings, both social and physical. when im in a certain place it can affect whether im happy or not...

and guess who agrees with me this time?!?! fastcompany just did blog post about how buildings can make you happy. guess im not the only one, am i?!?!

swine flu aint got nothin on paisa fever

2009-05-26T22:01:00.000-07:00

the next 2 weeks shall bring 2 cornellians to colombia, with the arrival of alina ahorita and wes the first week of june. then comes the bro. that officially brings the "syd's paisa persuasion" count to 6, with a pending 7th in october.

the colombian tourism agency should be giving me commission.

antioquia, te quiero.

2009-05-26T09:44:00.000-07:00

after another successful and funfilled trainee weekend, i once again realize how much i love antioquia and medellin. i LOVE trainee weekends because i get to see medellin and its neighboring towns through a first-timer's eyes, and this weekend was no exception. we once again made our way up to la piedra de peñol, complete with the most breathtaking view of the country's most treasured reservoir (that also happens to supply 70% of the country's power) after a grueling hike up over 700 steps. we once again made a promise to buy a casa finca in guatapé if and when we all have money from our successful lives. and we once again ended the day with a fabulous rumba in la ruana de juana (i dont care how mañe you think it is, we ALWAYS have a good time there). and i once again woke up with a sore butt, a guayabo, and a huge love and appreciation for this country and especially this department.

and now i await the 30 days until the arrival of the bro, which shall commense the weeklong tour de antioquia. im beyond excited.

done.

2009-05-20T11:53:00.000-07:00

finally i finished my damn tefl certificate. and with one day left to spare before it expires.

i guess it just goes to show i really cant get anything done unless theres a fire lit under my ass. this is probably a bad thing, but ce la vie.

im kind of a nerd...

2009-05-14T21:08:00.001-07:00

i like reading and talking about technology and the environment and existential shit. i barely drink. i enjoy doing academic type projects for fun. im really into the news. i take a 3 hour nap every saturday afternoon. one of my favorite activities is food shopping. gchatting is like a hobby of mine. sometimes when im out partying with my friends i become jealous of my 85 year old roommate who is at home, snuggled up in bed with a book...

and im happier than ive ever been. so heres to finding out my true calling in life is to be ñoña.

i had to...

2009-05-08T09:08:00.000-07:00

i don't know if colombia is ready...

2009-05-06T09:40:00.000-07:00

but here comes sir david lucas malawer! i guess we'll just have to wait and see how colombia reacts to him, though this is very likely to happen seeing as even to whiteys he looks so much like him.

and now i await june 24th to july 7th.

que tan bobo

2009-05-04T08:09:00.000-07:00

But when people get scared, they sometimes say or do dumb things. That includes Vice President Joseph Biden, who said Thursday morning on the Today show that the swine flu virus could spread easily on airplanes, and that he has advised his family against traveling anywhere on mass transit. "When one person sneezes, it goes all the way through the aircraft," Biden told Today host Matt Lauer. "I would not be, at this point, if they had another way of transportation, suggesting they ride the subway." (time)

just as dan quail will forever be known as the vp who couldn't spell for shit, joe biden will forever be known as the vp who should have put his foot in his mouth. (but im not going to lie i love him anyway)

so simple, yet so profound

2009-04-29T08:04:00.000-07:00

who knew that by doing away with such a simple item could conserve water and possibly help prevent your freshman 15 (or 37, as is the case with a girl from my hall freshman year)?

thats design for you baby.

fina-fuckin-ly

2009-04-28T10:08:00.000-07:00

im leaving for bogota thursday night. after 8 months in colombia i finally have the chance to go to the capital, see some more of the history of this beautiful country, and catch up with old friends.

pumped is an understatement.

why didn't i think of that?

2009-04-22T12:56:00.000-07:00

a blanket with sleeves!?¿!?¿!...officially the BEST invention i've heard of in a LONG time...

if i were still an undergrad, i would rock that shit everywhere i go...especially to the chapter house along with my nalgene and scarf.

mindfuck turned mission

2009-04-20T09:43:00.001-07:00

taso the last post was the beginning of an important realization that is slowly but surely becoming a personal mission for me. i realized, after much thought and many long conversations, that i am missing something big in my life, that something being religion. yes im jewish, but judaism to me is much more a culture and history of my family than an actual religion. because of this i realize that i have been living without religion for practically my whole life (well, techinically since i was about 9, when i realized sitting in the synogague during a wednesday hebrew school class that i didnt think god rested on the exterior, but rather inside each and every one of us), and consequentially have adopted my american cultural upbringing as my religion instead...

...and its just not working anymore (not that it ever worked in the first place). our culture is almost solely concentrated on what lies on the surface. we judge people by how they look, whether consciously or unconsciously. we judge OURSELVES based on how we think we are perceived. we can never SHOW weakness, no matter how weak we do in fact feel. we think we can tell everything about a person based on how they appear and try and manipulate other people's opinions of us by manipulating how we appear. our self esteem rises and falls depending on our weight or muscle tone or new hair style. whenever we hear an ex or crush or someone we're interested in is mackin it with someone else, instinctively our FIRST question is how we LOOK compared to that person. (how many times have your friends told you, "its ok...shes way fatter than you/shes got a big nose/she wears a moomoo/etc" to try and make you feel better?) whether we realize it or not we ALL judge based on the surface, whether it be other people or ourselves.

and i dont want it anymore. its been driving me nuts for almost my entire life, since the first time jared knee told my 7th grade boyfriend that he was dumb to be going out with me because i was fat (and of course the boyfriend told me, thinking i would find it funny...oh you silly silly boy). i never EVER saw myself as fat before that comment, and that was the beginning of the end for me. my mom would constantly tell me "if you lost 10 pounds youd feel better," but why? so that other people would stop judging me or so that i would start valuing myself higher despite other people? why did happiness (or rather, DOES happiness) revolve around our physical condition and whether or not we have a significant other? think for a second about this...whats the FIRST question you ask your friends who you havent seen for a while besides the colloquial "how you doin?"? you ask them about their love life, don't you?

im victim to it to, but ive gotten to a point where the surface has become obsolete. ive trimmed down and started relationships these past few months, but those didnt make me happy. when im happy im happy for reasons that exist in a different realm from those things, and ive decided i want to explore those. this next chapter of my life is going to focus on finding my religion (its probably better put spirituality, but i really do mean religion) rather than trying to find myself apart from my cultural religion that i have so unconsciously adopted.

so here i go.

mindfuck

2009-04-16T21:24:00.000-07:00

ive never really believed in astrology, though linds and i did have fun with her astrology book during our summer together in the ith. but today, as i was just shooting the shit with google before going to bed as i usually do, i put in my rising sign (as linds and i figured out that summer) and started reading some stuff.

it scared the shit out of me how dead on some of the things it said about my personality. things that i have never outright told anyone, nor have i had the courage to admit even to myself.

i have never felt so existentially naked before. i may have a new interest to keep me occupied for a while.